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I cried so hard. See,ing was finally loving that little girl who never felt good enough i did it for her. Nice looking 4 older classy am not perfect and I strugglewith self esteem but Wo,en recall where I was and where I am today and it straightens me out. Thanks for reading…this dog Is never too old to learn a new trick bring it on!

So Women seeking hot sex Foss that you have come to terms with your injuries done by others… that you have looked at your part in it and then gone San Juan wv woman want sex to rebuild yourself into the person you have now become.

What a feat that was! I am quite impressed FFoss all that you have done and overcome. I am also disabled and have multiple health problems? What if you are so afraid he will try and get revenge if you leave.

That he would do anything to hurt you back and nothing would stand in his way. His out of control anger. LEAVE, they have no respect or empathy for you, the longer you stay. I was with my narc ex for 10 yrs, he now uses my kids to make threats and bully me.

My ex even got engaged to a woman who is just as angry and even more hateful. She also puts me down as a mother and threatens to take my kids away, with no real reason but wanting me out of the picture, it hurts Fosa its hard to see how ppl can be so cruel and feel good about it, all the lies and manipulations and making you think you are crazy, its horrid.

I need some advice about a situation with a mother Women seeking hot sex Foss law and sister in law. There have been problem for about. I have many narcissistic tendencies including vindictiveness. When i read your post above I honestly feel more hopeless. There are people out there like myself who are desperately trying se change.

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Exactly my ex Narcissist husband goes ballistic anytime his flaws are brought to light. I tried to get counseling through the marriage but he refused. All he does Women seeking hot sex Foss lashes out at me and blames. France casual sex talking ill come get your bitch right now. It is useless to try. No room for you. Get away before he destroys who you are. They cannot be fixed. Reck your life leaving you in pieces.

They enjoy hurting you. My brother Iain enjoyed every single moment. I hope he gets his comeuppance one day. His mother Women seeking hot sex Foss a toxic Narc also and has almost zero friends everyone has figured her out. At the risk of sounding cynical, I think the only approach is to remain mildly skeptical of everyone you meet and to pay special attention to the match between what people say and what they do. Also, learn as much as you can about their other relationships.

Take your time before investing too much in a new relationship. The narcissistic person is Women seeking hot sex Foss clever. They Women seeking hot sex Foss tell you what they think that you want to hear. They will lie right to your Women seeking hot sex Foss and they believe their own lies. It may take months for you to figure that out. They act one way to other people and behind closed doors turn into monsters.

They will lead you on…and when they think that they have you hooked look out! When you leave the relationship be prepaid for a war against you…. What is the most shocking are the people that listen to the lies.

I wish I knew how to spot a narcissist before I got myself entangled in her web. My life has become a bit of a nightmare since My first attempt at walking away from her. First there was the plea asking me not to give up. Then I realized what she was doing and told her I was done that I was walking away. She broke the silent treatment to send me a xmas Mix male for Glendale possibly more, but No Strings Attached Sex Placerville I responded she became vindictive, cut all contact and had a cop tell me not to talk to her.

Four months passed, I emerged from the shock and grief, and wrote about my ordeal in my journal. I made the mistake of letting seeoing know that I forgave her and was moving hkt with my life. I wished her well. Three weeks later I got a letter from her lawyer. This is the short version. This sounds like a very confusing situation, and a bit like sabotage from an ex boyfriend or husband. I know this first hand, because I am dealing with it myself. Did you ask her why there was no contact?

Do you know for certain your messages went through? Would you know if she seking messaged, texted or called you and those messages went Women seeking hot sex Foss Did you ask her why a police officer contacted you?

Was she aware that took place? Why would she be angry with you, and what kind of letter did you receive from her supposed attorney? Does she know about the letter? And good ones are few and far between. My question to you would be, how did you feel when you were around her, in person. If you have not discussed with her in person or on Women seeking hot sex Foss phone about these steps taken my Flss officer and lawyer, I would encourage you to do so.

Chances are Women seeking hot sex Foss had nothing to do with it. I was in a similar situation and my former friend definitely was the one that called the police anytime I tried to get a hold in good faith. He usually curled in fetal position til mom smirked as she left til next unexpected visit! He gave me silent treatment, changed from Dr Jekyll to mr Hyde especially after his disappearance with plans made by his mom!

I Women seeking hot sex Foss known by all to b nicest, kind, yet strong willed woman as I was respected in my professional capacity! Please help on the approach I need do regarding court case. After a 3 year divorce that could have and should have been over in six months, since Fozs gave in to every single demand of his, Fos have one very important bit of advice: My first two lawyers took advantage of the situation and allowed it to drag out for Women seeking hot sex Foss.

A good lawyer is everything. Do everything through that lawyer, ALL communication. How do you interview attorneys? Meaning, what specific questions do you ask and what answers are you looking for? When can you trust an attorney?

How do we find one? Now supposedly his attorney is out of the country.

Acts supportive in front of others, but rarely supportive in actuality 2. Is extremely selfish 4. Gets disproportionately upset by any criticism, no matter how minor 9. Rarely credits you with accomplishments except in front of others.

Every human being understands the seeiing of compromise. A narcissist can Fods compromise because he Women seeking hot sex Foss she truly believes that their needs are paramount. Oh boy Susan this sounds like my Ex to a tee…. I dont think I could have Ladies seeking casual sex Smiley Texas 78159 it seekong way but this is it exactly!!

You know in your heart what they are doing is wrong, and uncomfortable, but the charm wins. It breaks my heart a bit every day. The type you are describing here sounds very much like the dyssocial type — some therapists consider the Women seeking hot sex Foss types related. I recently got way too close to a psychopath or at least that is what I percieve him to be. Your response will be greatly appreciated.

Best wishes from Denmark — Frans. Hi Frans, I tend not to think in diagnostic categories or to try to distinguish different categories of pathology. Just came across your blog, and it struck me. My ex was raised by a convicted sex-offender though he was not caught until 10 years after we were married. Women seeking hot sex Foss day, getting ready for a therapy appointment, my daughter went ballistic when she found out daddy was leaving work early to watch her and her brother instead of going to the sitters.

My ex went into self-protection mode.

My therapist bought it. He then got to work on destroying my mental health and my belief in myself as a good mom my mother, a child rape victim, supported him. Then I had another daughter with him; he used to Exhibition fun tonight in Sandpoint me from sleep, and I got pregnant. I decided to leave my ex when I started finding marks on the baby.

I called CPS, and they believed him. I went to counselors, and they believed him he even had one therapist at the YWCA convinced that I hated men!!

Because I am getting stronger and fighting for my youngest in court, I fear for her safety. Like I said, I want to sue all of the people who have not empowered me to help my daughter; people in the mental health profession who kept me sick.

If he hurts my daughter because he feels cornered, I will probably lose Austria mature sex mind for real this time. Thanks for making the link to honor killings in certain cultures. Greg, Females using the abuse victim thing as a weapon against men is far, far less common than hidden Wkmen against women.

Your reverence reminds me of OJ playing the race card in his trial. Knee-jerk reactions like yours rather hof a red flag of racism itself, not wanting to hear of it period, whether real or not. Your attempt to provide baseless stats to back up your statement is questionable and sloppy at best.

I respectfully ask that you please stick Women seeking hot sex Foss the subject of vindictive narcissism. I think you should remove or at least rebut the xex posted by Greg in reply to your response. Actually, he happens to be right. It does happen Women seeking hot sex Foss an angry enough woman will claim nonexistent abuse to malign the character of an innocent man.

My ex went so far as placing anonymous calls to local child protective agencies, claiming I was abusing and neglecting my kids, after I left him because he was having an hoot.

I only knew it was him because of phone records we still shared an account then and he was dumb enough to use his own cell phone. I understand that the topic for sed forum is specifically about narcissistic, abusive men. Are women somehow immune Woken this kind of behavior? Are we Adult ready sex personals Gresham Oregon trying to get a clearer picture of these behavior patterns for the sake of understanding and healing?

The emphasis has indeed been on men but there have been several comments about narcissistic women, especially ex-wives who abuse the seekint system to retaliate. Are there any websites that deal primarily with the abusive ex wife? Women seeking hot sex Foss is bent on completely destroying seeiing, and we are about to get deep in to the legal system, mostly about money stupid imho. What is the best Wojen to avoid court?

It seemsany time I defend myself, oFss sees it as an seekingg. Is there a way to kiss up to them so they think seekjng are getting the last word? I was just reading this after a nightmare about my sister. When mother died, she didnt call me until too late to talk to her or come, she stole seekiing new will, which I d seen sealed the week beforeshe had her children steal her jewelry happened to be seen by FFoss passing relativebut what floored me was having her children turn their backs on me and refuse to even say goodbye.

That wiped out my only close family. This is a much younger sister with blond star looks, adored and indulged all her life by me as much as my mother and stepfather; drawn to high Women seeking hot sex Foss and abusive relationships until she found a well off mug willing Fosw cater to her. She s convinced she s superior and Women seeking hot sex Foss whatever expensive whim passes her mind, no matter who else pays. A person of black poisonous rages yet outward charm; she s eventually Women seeking hot sex Foss many against her and also against me.

And I know she s laughing about it, have seen it with others. I hope others will learn to save their own Wmoen from such people; i never zeeking the message because you had to stay with family in my day. My mother and my x whom is now dead turned my kids whom he actually kidnapped Fuck dating Mexico kids Fiss against me.

My mother is very narsistic. My brother even killed himself at My husband was a drug addict, drunk and i found out he was even a pimp! He beat me every week, never once paid rent Women seeking hot sex Foss for food. I know i have miss spells here. On my phone with Women seeking hot sex Foss spell check and my arthritic hand often hirs the wrong letters on this tiny keypad.

For ten years, my good ole granny narsistic mother and my kids have bashed me continually. While googling this subject, all i found was pages about the men being the victims! I have started to just be angry and nit care anymore but i still get angry when they Lady wants sex GA Cherrylog 30522 their dead father as a great guy.

I have almost turned into a man hater! Her way of shaming him in front of authority figures. You are not doing anyone a favor by pretending that men are the only Women seeking hot sex Foss who are vindictive after a marriage ends. My husband and I have been on the receiving end of incredibly vicious and dishonest behavior by his ex-wife.

She continuously lied to seekingg children about things, blaming him for Women seeking hot sex Foss. Like when she pulled them out of their neighborhood school and away from all their friends, so Women seeking hot sex Foss could chase some man to another neighborhood: She tried to get my husband in trouble with the authorities.

She told the same lie to a woman friend of ours—in front of his kids. Once she threw a violent tantrum in the home she was sharing with the kids and her live-in boyfriend. She got so violent—throwing dishes, smashing things—that the boyfriend literally had to hold her down while the kids called She was taken away for observation. At the time, we had been traveling together out of state! The happiest day in our lives was when his kids were all 18 and there were no Women seeking hot sex Foss excuses for her to interact with us.

So please, get real and give a two-sided version of what really goes on out there. If even one woman can learn from my experience, I will be happy. There are some sick, vindictive women out there who will stop at Women seeking hot sex Lone Tree if they are still their miserable selves, and their ex is in a happy, loving relationship.

In those cases, I think the only thing se do is to break off contact entirely. There were No limits when it came to my ex husband and his vengeful ways!! I had suffered through the entire marriage, just being with someone who could have thoughts like that, let alone do the most ugly things imaginable to Women seeking hot sex Foss they had a child with Womenn horrible!!

Your story of the ex-husband and his vengeful nature, only Married But Looking Real Sex CA Berkeley 94703 me of mine and all the things he done seeklng i left him, it was terrible!!

To Women seeking hot sex Foss day, when or if he gets the chance to curse and scream at the top of his lungs to me, the Wommen ugly,horrific things, he will do it!! I was his second wife! Hatred for their ex-spouses run deep and very, very hard!! Somethings bad wrong with someone who thinks like that.

If you listen carefully, they will tell on themselves. They might not ever blame them seekinf for anything…but they for sure will hor their ex-spouses for it all!! I am going through this seeikng thing at Women seeking hot sex Foss moment. Years of physical and mentally abusive, emotional abandonment. He has even been to jail for assault by strangulation and assault in front of sx minor children.

Please contact me if you wish. Thank you for sharing this. Makes me feel like I am not alone…. Ssx am still going through this with my ex — and we divorced in He made false reports to the Department of Child protection, Women seeking hot sex Foss police, he called up all sorts of people including my employer trying to get me to lose my job.

I was a teacher right? According to his reports I was a drug addict, prostitute, child Women seeking hot sex Foss, been charged with fraud — you name it. None of this foul stuff was true. He also turned my son against his sister and all of my loving seeeking. I self represented against a lawyer, and won if there is ever any winning? He is a constant threat.

His affect on my children has been catastrophic. I just recently went through another episode I call them bombs with my ex. I left him 14 years ago and it never ends. The DV shelter that counseled me before I left him recommended going underground with my kids. The anger that I have Online personal fitness trainer certifition programs with from him is incredible.

Years ago I had severe problems at the daycare. The director pulled me into her office one day telling me he was saying awful things to the other parents about me and even following the teachers out to their cars telling them I was a bi polar lesbian, off my meds and dangerous. But even with his bizarre, scary Women seeking hot sex Foss they believed him.

All I used to do was say hi to everyone and pick up my daughter. To this day he is angry, abusive and Women seeking hot sex Foss on dragging my name through the mud. Several years ago I left my husband of two years in order to have economic freedom.

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I still loved him, but he would always answer my questions of love with the fact the I must pay my expenses which were, really, mostly his expenses. In addition, he believed the only way I could find happiness was in listening to him.

I left very sadlybut Lonely older ladies want swinger dates did achieve that freedomas I was bound by document to pay him for the rest of my life.

I wished to return to the marriage on a normal basis, but have found the last years of Women seeking hot sex Foss filled with constant blame and unkindness. I have been told that I am completely at fault and have been verbally attacked and Women seeking hot sex Foss. So my only recourse is to stop all communications. It is hard to understand why someone would want to destroy me, when I know in my heart that I offered uot man love, kindness, a good home and respect.

In return I received some companionship, but seeeking an appreciation of my worth as a person — in fact I have been repeatedly seekking intellectually and emotionally.

I am still recovering from the most recent attacks and have distanced myself for survival. I would like to meet with other seex Women seeking hot sex Foss such a situation.

Seking though I know Womne that these attacks are The beautiful woman at soboba and Women seeking hot sex Foss that this man is projecting, there is definite emotional pain connected to this. I survive by continuing to be myself, because,regardless of those attacks, I know I gave my heart to someone who married me for the wrong reasons. Thank you — Anonymous. The YWCA note the W is a nonprofit agency that provides advocacy, safe housing, and recuperative services for individuals, families, children impacted by physical, emotional, and sexual abuse.

Court testimony is provided for court-mandated cases.

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Not is a 24 hour hotline for people in crisis. Individual Women seeking hot sex Foss peer group counseling are part of recuperative services and there are some peer social groups. Child care and transportation may be available. Some YWCA agencies can provide in-home services. Until you can find in-person ssex group, go to other online forums like: Lisa Scottdr Irene, out of the fog and welcome to oz.

It helps and you can do Women seeking hot sex Foss any time of the day seekiing night. Some have found Codependentd Anonymous support groups and Alanon support groups helpful too. I found your reply to Jon above very interesting as well as this post, because I feel also that I am very attracted to narcissists due to their initial flattery and my low self-esteemthough, thank goodness, I am finally learning Women seeking hot sex Foss be seekong discerning.

I have a narcissistic boss and it is disasterous for the workplace, like a totally dysfunctional family — I overheard him on the phone once sekeing he closed the door saying aggressively to somebody presumably one of his grown-up children: He is a bully, but an extremely charming one.

He is a regular public speaker known publicly for his Women seeking hot sex Foss views etc. I wonder how on earth people can deal with narcissism in a boss — I certainly try to avoid him and never express any views to him following the above confrontation — but it makes for a poor workplace because it breeds a culture of blame and mistrust and fear.

In many ways, it resembles the experience of a child with narcissist parents, who has to conform to the needs of those parents rather than have their own needs addressed. At least you have the option of looking for another job! I am job-hunting, in fact. I am very hopeful, daunted etc as I begin this treatment, please wish me luck!

We have a boss who is also narcissistic. Everyone has a difficulty of establishing a good relationship with her because of the bad attitude. Manipulative, very emotional, critic of the works of others, one who is expert in demoralizing the ego of co workers or subordinates and verbally aggressive. I believe that a person like this needs medical and professional help, a sort of mental treatment.

If you did have the opportunity to treat such a person, how would you begin? Do you think you could ever succeed? If I were to treat such a Casual Hook Ups NJ Hillside 7205, virtually all of the work would need to focus on the transference. I would expect that contempt for and devaluation of me would feature powerfully, along with arrogance and some murderous feelings such as the ones you describe.

Behind all of that, however, I would expect wex find someone unbearably vulnerable, who loathes himself for his own needs and fears. Seekingg would be a long, hard slog. My narcissist had an emotional affair while I was ill. He refuses to acknowledge his lies, betrayal, secrecy and abandonement. He claims his poems about the ow were just friendship Women seeking hot sex Foss I am overreacting.

Housewives looking real sex Florence Massachusetts 1060 expecting recovery and repair with his help, he has told me I am on my own and in fact caused his loss of job he and she were found out at work.

His vindictiveness has surfaced in a way I have never seen. He filed divorce aex I am unforgiving and angry. He can not hold my emotions or say sorry. He then hit an injunction to keep our kids from going out of state with me as I would surely steal them. He is now trying to get me to reduce our home price so he can buy me Adult wants casual sex Cammack Village and actually afford it do es not consider how I am going to Women seeking hot sex Foss all while trying Women seeking hot sex Foss take half of my personal injury settlement.

He filed while o was a stay at home mom without medical insurance to pay for my type 1 diabetes. He said I better look quick for a job.

After arguing about why I should Adult singles dating in Mcloud, Oklahoma (OK). the price of our home for the buyout, he then says maybe we should just work it out.

He plays with my mind. There is no empathy or concern — only taking and Slim black Imperatriz guy iso bbw any race Whittier milf busty privileged feeling.

I believe that The VN will always feel he must continue to destroy the ex spouse long after the marriage is dissolved. Women seeking hot sex Foss Hairy sluts service Birmingham Ohio Women seeking hot sex Foss in the process of divorcing a guy she was married to for 20 years.

He blames her and the kids for everything, then plays the victim. His business allows him to hide hundreds Women seeking hot sex Foss thousands of dollars a year. Has his lawyer set and then cancel court hearings causing more delays. He can only feel comfortable if he creates conflict and chaos when he is present around the family. It appears that he accuses his family of is what he is projecting about his own pathology. He does very little to give but when he does it is for show only.

It sucks to see him winning at this game of life that he is dictating for my daughter and these beautiful children. I can only think that every dog has its day! Embarrassing to have fallen for Women seeking hot sex Foss false nice guy. He hated my mom. Cause she saw his selfish, cheap meany. My Ex is a complete Narcissist.

There is a strong history of mental illness in his family such as Seekinf and Depression. Recently, his sister was diagnosed with BPD. So I am wondering if there is any evidence that personality disorders are heredity like mental disorders? If indeed you are a professional, I hope never to cross paths with you.

Now we know that narcs have lack of gray matter as recently shown in MRIs, published elsewhere. Lady wants sex CA Santa cruz 95065 did something bad to them, and now we blame them????

This is transgenerational trauma sp. I hear so many women who underscore chose to marry a man and in a couple of years they are divorced because he is narcissistic, abuser. How about underscore Women seeking hot sex Foss to reproduce with this man? If indeed narcissism is in large part genetic, then those children are at Fuck buddies near Peterhead airy of being narcs themselves.

Are these ladies going to call their own flesh and blood, these creatures that they chose to bring to the world, things Acro-yoga sex Grove City murderous snakes? Or perhaps they will realize that their father, the man they chose, Women seeking hot sex Foss transmitting genes to their children that will select them as favorites for the development of narcissism?

I am 60 yrs old, and my 90 yr old mother just finished discarding me permanently. Believe me, it hurts seekig. But I saw the oWmen where she grew up, and knew of the cruelly-disadvantaged position that was her home. My mother adores animals, and thanks to her practice of rescueing them, today I serking a career working advocating animal rights.

Narcissists are not all bad, and they are victims themselves. Not that we should expose ourselves to their insanity, but if Women seeking hot sex Foss of you call yourselves a Christian, you better not judge. Mar, first of all, your message Women seeking hot sex Foss not quite bot. And it may well be true that they are sick, and Women seeking hot sex Foss product of their upbringing, their environment, their education, whatever, but that does not excuse their behavior. What you describe your mother doing, holding your hand while shooting Women seeking hot sex Foss, is truly tragic from so many angles; but to dismiss her behavior as merely a manifestation of her illness is irresponsible.

It is up to them to take advantage of those clear moments and seek help. Yes, they are sick; but they Senior dating service not unconscious. They are not robots going through life. They have brains and resources, some of them much, much more than others they are highly intelligent. The problem is that their illness is precisely what tells them there is nothing wrong with them.

This is what makes is so very difficult to treat, because the narcissist does not really believe he or she is sick. And Christianity has nothing to do with this. And particularly where the women has been rejected in favor of another.

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Woen Until the motivation to find a new path for themselves is higher than the motivation to remain a victim, their vindictive narcissists will revel in their victimhood and seek revenge. It is as simple as that. It is Women seeking hot sex Foss and cleaner to remain a Women seeking hot sex Foss and be vindictive than it is to do the sometimes brutal work of finding a new path.

The therapeutic key with these people — women or men — is to understand the psychology of motivation. I think the difference may simply be a sseking of accident, that I just happen to have encountered more men than women who behave this way. I know what you mean. Some people often with understandable, if misguided, reasons have antagonistic feelings toward the opposite sex and tend to explain everything in terms of the perceived faults of that sex: It simplifies issues and stops people from looking inward and taking responsibility for themselves.

Hating and blaming can be such a refuge from inner truth! Are you the adultery partner, perchance? If so, then Womenn it would have been Women seeking hot sex Foss not not target a Eat my pussy Green Bay Wisconsin man. This world gets distracted by the end domino, instead of tracing it back to the initial domino. My mum is narcissistic and divorced my dad. That he or she is actually a serial cheater or secret gambler, that he Fozs she had an affair with So-and-so, and so forth.

I guess Overland Park teens xxx would depend on the motivation.

Charming, handsome, passionate but oh so narcisstic. He cheated on my mother, which resulted in a divorce. He often had relationships with 2 or 3 women at the same time. He cheated on his ladyfriends in our presence and told me and my brother to keep Married housewives wants nsa Northeastern Manitoulin and the Islands Ontario mouths shut.

He even had a relationship with the wife of one of my teachers! I am so ashamed and mortified of Fosx. He left my mother with immense debts, which took her years to pay off. He dispases her for this. The mother of my half-brother was ruined by him. Twice he took off and disappeared abroad for a couple of years, without any contact, no explanation. Reappearing as if Fosss had happened. For years I underwent his fury, his anger, his blaming, his rage. I settled hoot the negative attention, desperate to know him.

According to him the women aeeking his life had treated him badly. His parents were hard, they beat their children daily in case they Women seeking hot sex Foss misbehaved. He Women seeking hot sex Foss and loathes his parents, who have been dead for years.

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He will always be his own number one. Then will come Women seeking hot sex Foss ladyfriend. I will never Women seeking hot sex Foss even third or fourth, if his ladyfriends have children, they will come before me or my brothers. Seekiny, I broke up all contact with him. I had no more tears left for him. I refused to be talked to or seekiny the way he did. After 6 months he wrote me a letter, where he sort of apologized for his behavior.

I reconciled with him, but on my terms. This works out just fine. I believe he hates women, he treats them really bad, despises them. Women are only good for sex and to show off what he can get. Do you think narcisstic characters are able to love? I have learnt to accept my dad will never change, My girl is gone for a bit really.

When someone blames everyone for everything bad in his life, assumes no responsibility for his heinous behavior and shows no ability to understand the feelings of anyone else, it seems pretty clear he lacks the capacity for empathy and for genuine love.

This had serious, actual, consequences: Only members of the mafia and immigrants from some uncivilized places still have this mentality. They know society will blame and despise them for the murder and that they will get at least 20 years of jail, maybe even a life sentence, depending on circumstances. Narcissistic murderers have only one thing in common with the men who committed crimes of honor: Apparently, men feel more entitled than women to think that others must live for them.

Something wrong with the way parents bring male children up? Whether the shame is strictly Fosd or reinforced by society, viewing another person as a aeeking extension of the self, meant to prop up our self-image, is entirely narcissistic.

Had been looking forward to it from the day you announced this would be your Women seeking hot sex Foss topic did not reply sooner because of vacation. When you say that viewing another person as a mere extension of the self — no matter if this happens due to internal or due to societal reasons — is entirely narcissistic, what does Women seeking hot sex Foss say about societies that still condone honour killings?

Swx men in these societies by default allowed to esx vindictive narcissists and get away with it? I think different societies tolerate varying degrees of individuation. On the whole, Western Civilization celebrates the individual whereas other cultures may revere the tribe, or conformity to a societal norm.

Individual self-fulfillment is not a goal of all societies; many others instead Women seeking hot sex Foss self-sacrifice in the service of the group.

The issue of honor killing is complicated. In many cultures, women are viewed as the possession of Murray Bridge male seeking black hot woman man, so in that sense, I think these cultures do promote a kind of narcissism. Such cultures are usually infused with notions of public honor and public shame, as well, so I guess in a way they are structurally narcissistic.

I wonder why male narcissism keeps existing and killing in evolved societies, that publicly condemn it. Why do Women seeking hot sex Foss guys feel entitled to think a woman must live for their happyness? A couple of years ago, I was in Rocky Mountain National Park about this time of year, when the elks were mating. The dominant males would protect their females from the younger males, bugling as Women seeking hot sex Foss warning and sometimes actually fighting.

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Eventually, I suppose, the elder males age and weaken to the point where the younger males drive them off or kill them. It feels like some vestige of the herd mentality and social hierarchies within the herd. What do you think? Social shame, the loss of honour is a matter of life esx death: And I think that patriarchal oppression of women is a mean, for males, to protect their genes: I Flss if this can be called narcissism. I would like to consult an ethologist Kayena sluts who want to fuck the role of shame sekeing animals: Wommen these feelings Fosd entitlement WWomen still there because the time when they were justified has not been over long, not even in western societies.

If you wanted to be an architect, you married an architect. Inside the minds of angry and controlling men. I very much appreciate Women seeking hot sex Foss article, as it helps me better understand the process that vindictive narcissists go through. The extreme measures that a VN will endure to protect themselves from narcissistic injuries Women seeking hot sex Foss incredibly scary — especially the sheer lack of ownership and twisted perceptions.

I successfully maintained my boundary to not engage in any further communication, but it led to some scary consequences — including having my house pelted with mud balls AND having her deliberately attempt to run me over with her truck when seeing me at a Women seeking hot sex Foss parking lot 8 months after I discontinued our friendship! The experience has left me fearful of entering into new friendships, because I obviously play a role in inviting these types of people into my life.

Through years of therapy, I am now Beautiful adult searching group sex IA in tune to the potential red flags of BPD and narcissistic behaviors, and I am working towards being more assertive in relationships my downfall.

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I never knew how dangerous it was until it happened to me. This was actually happening before i left him, he was watching me and listening to me, had devices hidden in our Women seeking hot sex Foss to record me, he hto crazy! Vengeful should be his name, he is full of it! I shoulda known better. His family, they all rallied behind him and supported him and his vengeful ways towards women, even his momma!

She once told me if i were to be Women seeking hot sex Foss submissive, i might not have the issues with him! I just had to learn how to deal and handle things, be watchful for him. He used to sneak up to our house windows at night, put his ear up to it, and listen to me and my son talking.

Anyways, i never returned home to that abuse or to any more abuse ever again. I now have a wonderful life, without him in it. People like that almost never get treatment. I am wondering if it would be possible to discuss this further with you?

I recently left what I believe wex be a VN, my husband and the father of two of my children. Almost a year ago my two older children were forced to leave bc of my husband, and hoot for the first time in their 11 and 12 years with their SP ht whom I never marriedwho has completely alienated them from me.

I left to try to get stronger, etc. I wholeheartedly believe he was watching me. Seekinng am blown away by his vindictiveness. Then he would turn back on the charm. I did not know that someone you loved and vowed to could possibly ever go to the depths he has. My digression, I Horny women in Paragould, AR. I suppose I am most interested in knowing how you Girls that wanna fuck in Edumafa that he was listening, etc.

He has messed Housewives want sex OK Mannford 74044 the electrical, etc. I have really truly been slaughtered by this man I was once a single professional mom. And then this man came and pursued.

I am hoping that maybe someone out there will take a chance on my truth. You may remember that scene in the film Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, where dangling from a rope into a cavern he drops a Women seeking hot sex Foss which illuminates a floor of congealed twisting snakes before he plummets in head first. Against the threatening hisses and striking fangs all he has is a little light in a dark place to move around the terrain cautiously. And so it is that most of us in some measure work to counteract our narcissism in the same way I would say.

Do the Women seeking hot sex Foss represent the feelings of narcissistic injury, where one wants to lash out and attack others due to unbearable shame? Oh yes, the most vindictive narcissists in my life have been my mother and a half-aunt whose pathological envy of me when I individuated, got into counseling and started asserting more boundaries ie realized i was being abused with the help of a third party, my boyfriend who asked me why I put up with this stuff, my initial reaction: Just figuring this all out, btw.

Women seeking hot sex Foss bye pathological family of origin filled with successful ivy league doctors and graduatesbye bye pathological flying monkey friends. OFss simpler, less complicated existence. And yes, the best thing to do with the vindictive narcissist is disengage. They really are not worth the trouble, of course we are trained to think otherwise.

I have heard horror stories from fellow survivors of N parents Women seeking hot sex Foss were more physically ruthless. I am starting to wrap my head against these same Women seeking hot sex Foss mechanisms taking place on a larger cultural and institutional basis.

Honor killings manifest this pathology perfectly. The offloading of shame is really an evil defense mechanism in my opinion, speaking as someone zex was the manifestation of all the badness inside my mother she could not hold herself. I am done carrying their water. I also like how you describe carrying the badness that cannot be tolerated by the other person.

Hey J, Such folks are best avoided — makes me think of Scientologists. Hopefully some of Single mature seeking porno naughty women evolved beyond that point. Revenge as a pleasurable motivation linked to survival.

That must mean that the narcissist experiences humiliation or shame as a kind of wex threat that calls forth the vindictive revenge response as a survival mechanism. By inference, a strong probability. You sure have a knack for writing clear and thought provoking Beautiful mature seeking adult dating South Portland Maine You say that you believe a narcissist has an unbearable sense of shame but what about those that have a very large amount of confidence.

She helps others with their work as long as it proves how smart she is and is constantly talking about others on the job behind their backs.

She uses that as a conversation starter. Sounds like a struggle with shame to me. I honestly find it hard to empathize with her and her sense of shame when I feel under attack. Her behavior in general just confuses me. She seems to be trustworthy,very seking and rational and never shows signs of frustration. I Women seeking hot sex Foss what you decide to do ought to take into account the potential threat she poses.

As you know, Women seeking hot sex Foss vindictive narcissist can be relentless in her search for revenge if her self-esteem feels threatens. I am not as educated as you and your guests that have replied, but women have the power, right or wrong, to do as they please with the lives of their ex-spouse.

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And ov-course everyone will believe or side with the female. Then all of a sudden men are ashamed??? Wow, what a statement! I know that, yes it is cases of some, not all women that do play the victim I m looking for love with a Blowing Rock in order to get what they want otr need at that moment in time.

Most women though are NOT like Women seeking hot sex Foss, at all! The real victims, which usually are women. I refuse to allow myself to be a victim.

What i am is, a former wife hto a maniac! I will not allow myself Soddy daisy TN housewives personals stand or live in the shadows Horny womens personals Finland former abuse.

The decisions that i have made, are to better the life of me and my child, who is a grown young man now. I got myself into this mess and i got myself out of this mess, of course with the help of some very wonderful people.

I really think that these people who are being abusive to their spouses, whatever their sex may be, are the ones who want to play victim in this game. Thank you for your article. I recently ended a relationship with a man I believe is narcissistic.

In ending, I think I made it pretty clear that I had figured out Women seeking hot sex Foss he was really like, figured Womej his desire for control, and his tendency to use and manipulate people. After the break up, Women seeking hot sex Foss coincided with other crises in his life, he fell apart and fell into a severe depression. We are co-workers, and he is in a position of higher power at our company.

For now, every time he sees me he flees in the opposite direction. How should I act Fosw we have to see each other face to face? The fact that he fell into a depression is a hopeful sign. If he turns to you emotionally, you might want to steer him toward psychotherapy. Hi, Joseph, and ses you for your reply. That gives seekig some Wmoen. He is in psychotherapy, or at least he was the last time I spoke to him. Hopefully his therapist will help him channel his feelings. He has been going through a major life crisis as a result of his selfish, unempathic behavior, which, among other things, ended in his Womdn me although he claimed he loved me.

Can someone like that change when Women seeking hot sex Foss with a life crisis? I was married to a narcissist for fourteen years, had three children, and divorced him three years ago.

I grew up steeped in fundamental religion Women seeking hot sex Foss the Wojen of eex was the norm. Narcissism was all I knew. Things finally started making sense. I sought help from a secular counselor and filed for divorce soon after. While my ex had seex girlfriend a college student who worked for him whom he later married towards the end of our marriage who knows about the earlier yearsit was the maddening confusion and manipulation that was the most difficult.

He has since told family, friends, Beautiful couples wants online dating Los Angeles California our three daughters that I left him for another man.

Real victims are silenced while narcissists play the martyr and get off scot-free — all the while accusing us of playing Wmoen victim card. It is constant projection. One could easily feel like they were going crazy. I understand this — in fact, this has been my MO with him as well Women seeking hot sex Foss members of my family — but the injustice is maddening.

I realize my peace and worth lie in knowing the seekign in my heart and yet there are times when I wish so badly it would all be exposed — regardless of the aftermath. While I was, in fact victimized, I am determined to be the hero of my life and Womem the victim.

I Women seeking hot sex Foss understand that sense of injustice, and I admire your resolve not to take refuge from it in the victim role. The fact that Discreet sex Dover Florida ex-husband is a minister complicates matters, since he holds a certain stature in the public eye and no doubt makes sure to keep his vindictiveness out of view.

You just hit a nerve! I have scanned the web for hours looking for help in how to deal with an Extreme Narcissist who happens to be a Priest. Talking about Clergy seems to be Taboo. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. These men are given too much power, and are seldom checked on by their superiors. If you are brave enough to file a complaint to the Human Resource Dept. They protect these men with a vengeance.

I worked for my Church for over 20yrs. I had the pleasure of working with some wonderful Priests. But the current Pastor is not one of them. Understanding that he was not going to change, and the situation was not going to improve, I decided to hand in my 2 week notice and get as far away from him as I Adult seeking casual sex Washington Virginia 22747. What are you supposed to do when you try to walk away, but they still seek you out for attack?

He was verbally and sexually abusive with me during our marriage. Nude chats in Santa clarita had Women seeking hot sex Foss children in Women seeking hot sex Foss marriage. He was physically and emotionally abusive to our son.

Spanking in anger, putting his head in the Women seeking hot sex Foss for leaving a little urine on the Women seeking hot sex Foss, and there are dents in the fridge doors from my sons head, yet my ex was still permitted visitation, and eventually gained the custody of the son by turning him against me-basically my son turned into a reporter for his dad against me. During our married years, the evenings were always unpredictable with him and how he would respond to our son.

Now that our son is an adult, my ex has his sites on the daughter. I think our daughter is feeling like she got her hand caught in the cookie jar because she is seeing her father do this court drama stuff due to her venting and complaining, as most teens will do anyway.

He is a charmer, knows right from wrong, and will indeed read into the questions and that concerns me. If he is a narassist, psychopathic, borderline, or anything else, will it bring it out? A funny closing story, my ex wrote a 4 page letter and passed it out to all of the neighbors in my former neighborhood, our attorney, the editor of our local paper, and who knows all else.